Deeper into the Hotwife Rabbit hole

Things are always changing, is our relationship changing or is my attitude and comfort level changing, a few months ago when we first started this i struggled, it was a challenge to keep my jealousy in check, i was trying to control a lot of what happened, who she met when she met what was allowed when they met, i had fears, )Fear Vs. Jealousy), But i started to look deep within myself something about this turned me on, something about this felt right (Looking Within Part 1), (Looking Within Part 2), current tally, she has met and fucked 5 different men for a total of 8 times. Right around gentlemen number 4 or 5, i started to realize i need to be prepared, i need to be a realist. 

All of the following are possible scenarios that played out in my head some worst case, some just the natural progression of things, when i brought these thoughts and possibilities up she reasurred me that she would never do anything to jeapordize us, she would follow whatever rules we set (she is extremely greatful for this opportunity, there arent many husbands that would willingly allow this type of adventure and she knows that)  

She's alone lot (correction we are both alone separately a lot) she is an amazing outgoing lively woman, she's the type that can make a best friend in the ladies room, she needs to be out but hates going  out alone. When she started chatting with her potential dates some men talk about taking her out to dinner, or away for the weekend. I started to notice im going to have to be ok with her going out on actual dates, which is actually good she needs to be out she deserves to be out, but what about potential overnight stays? a couple of the men she was chatting with invited her to weekend getaways and while she declined (she hadnt even met them yet), but as time goes on after she has seen him a few times the opportunity for a weekend getaway will come up, originally i had said no repeats, and no overnights. My insecurities had me believing she'd meet someone better, and leave me and id have no one to blame but myself. but as we progressed deeper into this lifestyle, i started to realize im away too much whats to stop her from doing these things without my permission? she's honest and faithful i dont really think she'd ever do that but... what happens when shes finally had enough, enough being alone, enough nights with no intimacy or sex, enough of her basic needs not being met because i cant be there. We have a very special and very strong relationship, it took a lot for me to recognize how true this was. when i mentioned the possibility of overnights and that id be ok, she tried to assure that wouldnt be necessary, they will most likely be drinking, or parting ways late, some of these rendevous are an hour plus drive from home, id rather her spend the night with him than either of them risking an accident or DWI, and this made perfect sense, this option also began morphing she likes to take weekend trips to do some sightseeing or shoppiong and as she started thinking more about the possibilities of a having a man with her all night, she started thinking how much safer she'd feel in a strange town in a strange hotel with a man there. 

now she has her lovers/companions, i also originally had a hang about intimacy between her and her dates at first i told her no kissing, i felt it far to intimate that should be something between two people deeply in love, this rule got tossed very early, we had a very deep conversation about our different views on kissing, it started to become apparent that by forbidding kissing i was stunting her experience, also my beliefs where based on some bull i heard or read when i was a kid. i lifted this rule right before she met her first guy, and i surprised her by asking for video of them kissing when they met a second time. seeing her with another man kissing him, fucking him, his hands all over her is incredibly arousing (i dont really understand it but thats for another post entirely)

once i had ok'd overnights and weekend getaways, i knew the possibility for cuddling was there, i could forbid it but when your fast asleep with another body next you its just instinct to cuddle up. as i explored all these possibilities i noticed that by imposing so many rules and expecting only so much to happen, i was setting myself up for failure, i cant send her off with another man for sex with a list of do's and don'ts, Imagine being given a new sports car but being told you cant go faster than 25mph. How is she supposed to enjoy herself if shes having to make sure she doesnt break a rule, in order to succeed, in order for me to allow her to get the most enjoyment out of this (that's what this is about, HER pleasure) i need to keep my feelings in check, i need to trust her fully, i need to understand that its human nature to Cuddle, Hug, Kiss, and Caress, and honestly whats the point of sex without any of these, without these its just assisted masturbation. 

SO to answer the question i started with, i think our relationship is changing because my attitude has changed, this change has opened up a whole new realm in our Hotwifery, we are no longer searching for NSA, One Night Stands, or flings, we are searching for boyfriends, men that can and will provide companionship, satisfaction and protection, men that understand they are not the only one in her life, men that wont get too clingy or needy. We Are becoming a Poly couple, I am married to a very Polyamorous woman, and any man who has the pleasure of experiencing her is one lucky Motherfucker!

Tips for picking up a HotWife!

So you saw an ad on Craigslist or Ashley Madison, and you want to meet her. 

Although I personally have never replied to either of these, iv read hundreds of replies from men wanting to meet up with my HotWife. These tips won't apply to all woman but I feel like this is a good general idea of how to succeed with an NSA hookup/one night stand/FWB 

1. Do not send a Cock picture (unless she asks for it.) In our case a cock pic gets you an immediate rejection, every other reply that comes back is a cock iv seen more cock in the last two weeks then I'd like to admit to. 

Do however send a face pic, if your uncomfortable sending a face pic right out of the gate send a full body (clothed) with your face obscured, then once your more comfortable send her your mug, most woman need to feel some level of attraction and this is definately true with my wife. 

2. Drop the machismo, she doesn't want to hear about how you'll "pound her real good", or how you'll "make her cum over and over" "I'll do you 10 - 20 times in a night" .... Really??.. Really? Do you really think that's gonna work, Has it worked ?

I suggest you try charming her, and it doesn't have to be some sappy bullshit, this is after all a one night stand/hookup you don't need to convince her your husband material. You do have to convince her your nice, respectful and safe. Her most successful hook-ups have started out with respectful naughty talk, offer up a massage, one guy offered to take her to the hot springs for an overnight get away and although I thought it a very smooth gesture, it was a bit much for a first meeting. 

3. If you get rejected, bow out gracefully, don't beg for a chance it just makes it worse. She very respectfully told one guy "I'm sorry but your a bit older than I'm looking for" (she has an age range in her ads) his reply was "but I make up for it in enthusiasm" the next one sealed his fate "I'll bet you that if I can't do you between 8-10 during the night I'll give you 500.00" 

She replied with something along the lines of "honestly I'm not interested, that's not impressive at all  and why would any woman want to hear that" 

Of course he was done "ok fatso see how many young guys fuck you" and then something about how her pic was gross, she was beautiful and sexy enough for you to be able to do her 8-10 times in one night only moments ago. If she has an age range or other criteria that you don't meet respect that, you can still try but don't be a dick when she says no thanks.

4. Make an effort with your first contact, I know my wife will give most well worded requests a look if there's a face pic and she's slightly attracted to you she will reply, but don't just send a hey sexy I like your pics, (unless your panty dropping handsome) then she'll melt at your feet. My favorites are the misguided "wow you have huge tits, can I see more pics" (are we trolling for fap material? Or are we trying to hook up) cause she's legit offering the real thing play your cards right and you might get to touch her huge tits. 

5. When your chatting before actually meeting don't be dull! Hold a conversation, reply promptly when she texts you, remember she doesn't need you, there are dozens of emails pouring in every hour, she's looking for someone to fill a void or provide a thrill it doesn't have to be you it can be the next guy very easily, I'm sure it's no secret as soon as a woman posts an ad like what my wife posts, theres no shortage of men to choose from. Which in turn means she can be choosy she can be very choosy, for one she's married, she's got a man, she doesn't do this because I'm lacking as her husband, she does this for the thrill, she does this to fill the void when I'm not home. 

6. A continuation from the last tip, remember she has a husband, you are not there to replace him, your not there to rescue her from some terrible marriage, this should not be a competition between you and her husband. One real quick way to end a "date" on a bad note would be to bad mouth her hubby.  You should be greatful that her husband is letting you have her for a few hours. What many don't realize is that couples that live this type of lifestyle are typically much closer than you'd expect. Our communication is a top priority in our marriage, I read almost every message, every email, she tells me about every conversation, and every experience, I share her with you and she shares the experience with me, and then we have the most amazing sex while we reconnect with each other. It takes a very secure individual to be married to a HotWife, she gets the best of both workds she has a man who loves her unconditionally, provides for her and is a true partner in life he is there through the good the bad and the ugly, all while she can go out and have sex with as many men as she wants, as often as she wants, unless your prepared to fill those shoes, just enjoy her company and do what you came to do. 

The key words here to successfully land a date with a HotWife are to be respectful, kind, somewhat charming and have some tact. NSA relationships don't get much easier than this, 

Any thoughts or additional tips I could add to this list? Put them in the comments below. 

Back in the Game

Last week I mentioned how I'm suddenly missing her adventures. so i brought it up to her she mentioned how she enjoyed having that release when she couldnt have me, so we agreed to dive back into it. the first go around we had a system she would put out ads on Cragslist and Ashley Madison, and together we'd go through the respones and decide which ones to chat with further. part of the deal was they had to talk to me and get approved by me before she had final approval. it was a fairly long drawn out process and although we had approved about 5 to 8 guys only one guy ever hooked up with her. they met 3 or 4 times and sent me pics and video, then one weekend while i was in town all 3 of us got together to tag team her. (wrote about that earlier). she did the usual Craigs list ad and Ashley Madison post and began weeding through the asshats that think woman like hearing about how they can "pound her real good" or "I got a 9inch Dick" (seriously guys even if your just trying to pick her up for a one night stand have some tact and taste it goes far). i stayed out of it, i decided i was curious as to where she goes with this. i lifted a few of my previous limits. the hard limit list is actually much smaller now, i think because we'v done this 5 or 6 times with 2 different guys, and our great summer together im in a very good place our relationship is rock solid and i love seeing her satisfied. 

the ads went up sat or sun i believe she started chatting a few guys up monday, i had an idea to add a little excitement and i issued her a challenge, i challenged her to find a cock to suck this weekend if she chose to accept, i started toying with the idea of upping the ante with each completed challenge, at first she seemed a bit surprised esp by the short notice. then tuesday morning early i get a message that says "trust my Judgement?" with some screen caps of a convo with some guy from AM. i asked if that meant she was accepting my challenge, her reply "no just looking to find someone for future meetings" i was slightly disapointed but i dont want to push her either this is her boat shes driving im just watching to see where it goes. i did tell her i wasnt kidding about the challenge if she was comfortable its ok with me if she wants to accept it. An hour or so later she called to tell me how the meeting went, she met him in a parking lot and got into his truck, he immediatley leaned over to kiss her and play with 

and started undoing her pants to finger her so she replied in kind and started suckinng his cock, Challenge Completed!! then she tells me he was begging me to let him fuck me so i fucked him in the back seat of his truck!!! I think i stutttered and said what!! this is so hot and i cant believe the affect its having on me. 

She's becoming such a horny slut and I'm loving it. She currently has 3 guys lined up one that she's met and one that she plans on meeting Thursday and one maybe this weekend. I have a feeling there will be plenty of material for upcoming blogposts

Been awhile!

Sorry for the apsence, we were able to spend the last month+ together. And you would assume that would have provided plenty of material for updates but it was a very vanilla month. Just us as a family doing family things, there was really no oppurtunity to seek out other partners, nor did there seem to be a desire too. We just enjoyed each other. We were a couple to the truest sense of the word. 

Looking back I don't feel we missed any oppurtunity, like we should have done this or that, I loved just being together. But now... Now that she's gone, now that's she's 3000 miles away I miss everything, I miss having her close, I miss waking up next to her, I miss going out and just being us, but I'm also now missing her flirty playfulness, I miss the rush of jealousy, I miss seeing her flirt and have fun. Am I really saying this? Do I really miss it? What's has she turned me into, I really am the Hubby of a HotWife! While she was here I had no desire to share her, she was mine and I just kept her all for myself, why now that she's home I am excited for her to date again, there was a term she found that described this let me see if I can find it... "Compersion" (A feeling of joy when a loved one invests in and takes pleasure from another romantic or sexual relationship.) It's one of those things that is really mind blowing to me, iv said it before but this isn't me I'm usually very jealous so the fact that I'm 1) ok with this and 2) actually missing it and wanting her to find another partner to play with. Hubby of a HotWife to the core!